I have been having problems with sleep lately. What is happening in the world today is causing my mind to think. A lot. It does not help that I am an over thinker. I miss those times when I could just close my eyes and drift into the dreamland.
So I decided to sign-up to our company's amazing Wellness & Resiliency program that each employee can avail. As a teammate of TaskUs, you can either talk to a Life Coach, or what we call yogi, or you can talk to a therapist/psychiatrist from a third-party organization. I have started these sessions in 2020 when the pandemic unfolded and the majority of the world transitioned from office to work-from-home setup.
Sleepless nights have led me to deep contemplation. I have asked many what-ifs. What does the future hold? Is this current lifestyle working for me? Is my current setup in life sustainable? What is happiness?
You see, as a woman in her mid-30s, my definition of happiness has changed. A decade ago, happiness meant having more money and possessions and the ability to support loved ones. Now, happiness has a totally different meaning. Money and material things are nothing if you're sick. You won't be able to enjoy it. Worse, you will lose it to pay for the hospital and medical bills.
Today, happiness means living a peaceful life and being healthy in all aspects, while of course, being free.
A loved one told me that I have reached a point when most of my needs have already been met. They mentioned the Maslow's hierarchy of needs. After ensuring that I can afford basic (physiological), safety, and love and belonging needs, I am now in the last two stages - esteem and self-actualization.
From wanting to own material things, I am now in my quest of achieving a higher purpose. What kind of life do I want to live? If my ultimate purpose is to be a teacher, is my life now contributing to that? This mind is going bonkers. =)
But how can I achieve peace?
PEACE DEFINED
The yogi asked me, "How do you define peace?"
As a response, I told her the story of a painting contest. The winner should be able to capture the true definition of peace. One painting visually showed a serene forest, with tall and thick greenery of trees, mountains, birds flying, all in a beautiful sunny morning.
Looking at it was oh so peaceful.
But it never won.
Instead, the one who won is a painting of a forest in complete chaos. It shows trees almost destroyed because of typhoon and strong winds. The dominant color is almost gray because everything was flooded. But somewhere in there was a cave, almost invisible to the gaze.
In that tiny, yet sturdy cave, is a mother bird with her young. Amidst the storm and chaos outside, the bird calmingly nurtures her chicks. She is safe, warm, and protected in her cave.
That painting emerged as the winner. So, I defined peace with that. Regardless of what is happening externally, that cave is so strong, so intact, that no one can ever threaten or destroy it.
The yogi told me, "See? Your definition of peace has nothing to do with your work, your family, or anything outside yourself. It is all about what's within you."
The yogi then challenged me to build my own cave.
BUILDING THE CAVE
My session with the yogi helped me recreate or find my moments of peace. To live a peaceful life is a conscious effort - a decision that we have to make.
In this chaotic world, key to our survival is to be at peace with ourselves. Many people do meditation or a lot of praying, but we can also achieve peace in the smallest and mundane things. In my case, it is sipping coffee, walking, or simply doing nothing. And most of all, sleeping. Unfortunately, this last one is the hardest to do at the moment.
One of the team members from our Wellness & Resiliency program said that sleep is important because it takes the subconscious to the fore. So, our dreams, whether they are happy dreams or nightmares, are our brain's way to help us survive by addressing the emotions we try to dismiss during our awake and conscious moments.
Sleep, along with the above mentioned examples of mundane moments of peace, is necessary for us to recuperate and refuel. When we are too sucked up and absorbed by the pressures of the world, the next best thing to do is to retreat, to go back to your cave, and rest.
And after resting, the cave is also useful to plan for your next move. Our own caves help us to look at things at a different perspective. Perhaps if you're like that mother bird who came from the chaos outside, coming to the cave is the opportunity to temporarily shutdown and recharge, to nourish yourself. So that once you go back outside the crazy forest, you have the energy and the overall capacity to survive.
I have written the following questions to help us recreate or find our moments of peace.
1. When did you last feel that you're genuinely calm and happy?
2. Are these experiences good for you? If yes, why?
3. Can you document what you can see, feel, smell, and taste during these experiences?
4. How are you after these moments? Were you able to resolve a conflict?
4. How can you recreate these moments?
Once you have answered these questions, you can start the process of building your cave.
While it is nice to be in our caves for a long period of time, we still need to go out and navigate our way to the storm outside. A vital detail in the painting is that the cave remains open, because eventually, we have to go back to the outside world.
But the good news is, we can always come back inside anytime, whenever we need it.
I hope you find those moments of peace to be able to build your own cave.
0 comments:
Post a Comment